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Wanda's dishwashing machine quit working, so she called a repairman. Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, 'I'll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I'll mail you a check .'

'Oh, and by the way, I have a couple of pets. You don't have to worry about my dog, Spike. He won't bother you. But whatever you do, do NOT, under ANY circumstances, talk to my parrot!'

'I REPEAT ... DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!!!'

When the repairman arrived at Wanda's apartment the following day, he discovered the biggest, toughest looking dog he had ever seen. But, just as the woman had said, the dog didn't bother him. He just lay there on the carpet, watching the repairman go about his work. The parrot, however, was a different story. He drove him absolutely nuts the whole time with his incessant yelling, cursing and name calling.

Finally the repairman couldn't contain himself any longer. He stood up and screamed, 'Shut up, you stupid, ugly bird!'

The parrot, with a look of vengeful indignation, replied, 'Get him, Spike!'

The moral of the story: Men just don't listen!

submitted by VH